Ice Ribbon (1.5.19) review

Ice Ribbon (1.5.19) review

Ice Ribbon 933 – Frank Sisters Produce I Like Frank More Than Three Bowls of Rice

 

January 5 2019

 

The sceptics among you may think I’m only watching Ice Ribbon because I want to inflate my promotion count by watching a show that under two hours. My actual reason for watching it is the ridiculous show title.

 

We’re in Yokohama, Japan at the Radiant Hall. Apparently the venue, which is a church, is haunted and no one likes wrestling there due to a history of injuries occurring. As per usual when dealing with a new building I throw a map up to see what’s nearby. Best place I can find for pre-show drinks is a place called Yokohama Muse and this place is shady as fuck. Women get in for free and single women drink for free. Oh, one of those places.

 

IRchurch

This is the building. It’s a church alright. The name of the show seems to stem from Frank’s hot dogs and three of the wrestlers advertise hot dogs in the ring before the show.

 

Ibuki Hoshi vs. Hiroyo Matsumoto

Although this show is clipped they leave the entire of the opening match in. Albeit with the commentators in picture, drinking beer, so you miss the odd bump!

IRcoms

Matsumoto you should know. She’s even wrestled for WWE. Hoshi is 15 years old and has been wrestling for about 18 months. She puts up a spirited performance but rarely gets any joy. But that’s the idea. Show that heart and learn from being in the ring with a better, more experienced wrestler. Hoshi’s best chances come from roll ups and any attempts at anything more complex are rebuffed. Hiroyo crushes Hoshi with a few top rope moves after she feels Hoshi has learned enough for the day. Solid stuff. Veteran versus rookie destruction. Matsumoto was never really pushed.

Final Rating: **1/2

 

Moeka Haruhi & Makoto vs. Mochi Miyagi & Papillon Akemi

IRMakoto

Makoto is wearing black, Haruhi white. A tag team of contrasts. They seem to have a cute gimmick. Miyagi is a stout girl with a whip. Akemi is a clown? It’s a man? I think it’s supposed to be a cute gimmick too only with the mask having enlarged cartoon eyes. It’s honestly quite unsettling. He keeps yelling encouragement in a falsetto voice. The referee spemds most of his time trying to subdue Akemi while Miyagi gets double teamed.

This is quite the match of contrasts. You’ll be pleased to know Haruhi was not injured taking this death plex. Honestly though, I want to GIF a lot of Papillon Akemi and it won’t come across right because any loss of vocalisation and you lose the comedy. Suffice to say I chuckled throughout this. Perhaps the best example is the high pitched kick to break up a pin but the noises continue throughout. Your mileage on enjoyment will vary as to whether you find Akemi amusing but I had a lovely time. Makoto beats him with a powerbomb but Akemi has already won my heart.

Final Rating: ***

 

Tsukasa Fujimoto & Hamuko Hoshi vs. Maya Yukihi & Tae Honma

IRTaeHonma

Tae Honma is very happy with the number of her streamers. Yukihi is the ICE Infinity Champion, a title she took from Tsukasa.

This starts out as a hot dog eating contest. No, they’re not eating Frank the ref. Although his hot dog dingus pleacement is wildly inappropriate. There appears to be a round system. So they wrestle a bit, then eat a hot dog, then wrestle some more, then more hot dogs. This is frankly a recipe for disaster. Is it under ‘first person to puke loses’ stips?

I do love the psychology behind it. Fujimoto at one point storming across the ring to land a killer blow and it’s hot dog time again! Also shots to the stomach have greater effect due to everyone digesting food. Hoshi looks like she’s going to hurl. The trouble with constantly stopping a match to eat food is it effects performance and it’s hard to build to anything. There’s probably more time spent standing around eating hot dogs than actually wrestling. They consider a four food coma count-out. Honma submits because she’s got two hot dogs in her mouth and is actually choking but the real winners, via hot dog consumption are Yukihi & Honma. Which makes me wonder what happened to all the hot dog sticks from the other team because Fujimoto clearly ate more than anyone else. The Frank’s Sisters Produce screwjob!

Final Rating: I can’t rate this but I am quite hungry now

 

Hardcore Match

Yuko Miyamoto & Risa Sera vs. Minoru Fujita & Akane Fujita

IRFujita

Yes, Miyamoto photobombed the Fujita pre-show pose. Risa and Akane hit each other in the head with baseball bats, which is very violent.

Then it’s a baseball game. Then it’s back to hitting each other with bats. They jump in and out of comedy and all three commentators are in bits when Miyamoto gets knocked over by the airplane spin. To be fair, they have been drinking for over an hour at this point. The introduction of a giant tub of lego is absolutely sick. Ole Kirk Christiansen is probably turning in his grave. It looks like they’re all having a good time, unless they have to take one of those lego bumps. They take some pretty sick bumps too. There’s a goddamn superplex into lego. Sera dives onto a ladder that squashes Akane. Eventually Akane is buried under so much plunder that she can’t kick out. I already loved Risa Sera but I found a new appreciation for Akane here. Plus she retweeted my GIF of the baseball. Good fan interaction.

Final Rating: ***1/2

 

Hiragi Kurumi vs. Kengo Mashimo

IRKurumi

Kurumi is at a tremendous disadvantage in terms of size and strength but it’s not so big to make it unrealistic. Kurumi throws herself into things so her bowling Mashimo over feels legit. Kengo is a dick about his role in the match, which is the Big Bad Guy. As a marked contrast to the rest of the card there’s no fucking about here. They go right into the business of beating each other up and business is good. They do a great rope running sequence where both follow in and eventually Kurumi gets daylight and creams Kengo with a lariat. It’s a tidy match. I like Kengo but I’m also aware of his limitations. He won’t have massively exciting matches but he can bump, he can sell and he tells coherent logical stories. He is a Solid Hand. Kurumi impresses me a great deal. She uses her size well and I dig anyone who hurls themselves at their opponents. Kengo gets the tap out with a double armbar. Good, hard-hitting contest. Kurumi held her own.

Final Rating: ***1/2

 

Summary:

Ice Ribbon is a weird goddamn show. I like it! The undercard was a strange mesh of comedy spots but with crazy stuff mixed in. Culminating in the semi-main that was a hardcore match with bags of comedy. The main event itself is where the show got proper serious. The whole package was a nice experience and I’ll be sure to come back again. I can’t believe this is my first Ice Ribbon show.

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