Chikara King of Trios 2017 Night One
September 1 2017
We’re in Wolverhampton at the Starworks Warehouse for the first International Chikara King of Trios. This happened right down the road from me and I didn’t go. I had good reasons though. Namely I need to work for a living and was working on these dates. Otherwise I’d have been there, whooping it up in the Starworks and drinking them out of Jack Daniels….again. Chikara is “family friendly” so no swearing is permitted. There’s no way I’d have made it through these shows. Director of Fun/commentator is Mike Quackenbush.
House Calamari (Chris Brookes, Kid Lykos & Elijah) vs. House Bike Cops (Officer Warren Barksdale, Donald Kluger & Jasper Tippins)
I’m not familiar with the Chikara boys. I’ve seen Barksdale a couple of times but that’s it. Elijah is taking the spot of Travis Banks, who was named for this but bailed to be in BOLA. Can’t say I blame him. #CCK would have been genuine contenders to win the tournament but seeing as they’re not competing as the original unit I can’t see them going deep into the KOT. Lykos amuses me with his usual ‘brainbuster’ shtick. Brookes gets his boys organised into some sick fucking tag moves. #CCK get their act together and it’s FUCK THA POLICE! Barksdale and his pig cronies are gone in the first round. Long live the dirty wolf!
Final Rating: ***1/4
House Bodyslam (Emeritus Midnight, Michael Fynne & VASYL) vs. House Rot (Hallowicked, Frightmare & Kobald)
Bodyslam Pro Wrestling is a Danish promotion, which is why you’re probably staring at those names and wondering who the fuck they are. House Rot are Chikara regulars with Hallowicked and Frightmare being big stars for that promotion. Hallowicked is one of those Mr Chikara kinda guys. A top 5 pick for everyone on the ‘name a Chikara wrestler’ poll. Fynne is the only unmasked wrestler in this contest. There’s something strangely detaching about having so many masked wrestlers on one match. Especially with the Danish fellas being such an unknown quantity. The match doesn’t do much for me and it drags because of that. Denmark doesn’t exactly have a stacked wrestling scene. Scandinavia has two types of wrestlers, that I’ve seen, guys who are into death metal and guys that are into weights. Emeritus is into death metal, in a big way. VASYL has a teddy bear, which Frightmare launches into the cheap seats. It seems VASYL is a simpleton who does freaky power moves. I’m all into that. They missed a trick by having him appear so little in the match. Emeritus takes too much of the match and eats Never Wake Up for the pin. I need more VASYL!
Final Rating: **3/4
House Seven Seas (Cajun Crawdad, Hermit Crab & Merlok) vs. House Revival (Jody Fleisch, Jonny Storm & Johnny Moss)
I almost wrote “Doug Williams” instead of Johnny Moss. If you remember the actual “Revival” show from back in the day I’m pretty sure Moss wasn’t on it. That said Moss is one of the most underappreciated pro-wrestlers in the world, let alone the UK. While the elder statesmen of BritWres are capable of fast-paced nutty action they opt for goofy comedy stuff. Or at least Storm does. Part of my issue with Chikara is that they have daft gimmicks but a lot of the work is very pedestrian compared to other promotions. They used to have more off-the-wall stuff. Darkness Crabtree springs to mind. Cajun Crawdad has the gator roll at least but they, as a unit, try to get nerve pinches over. Mossy bosses the match with his powerhouse moves. The double back suplex in particular is mint. He even upstages his partners on the dives front, for fuck’s sake. Emerald Flowsion puts Storm down for three and a very unpopular loss for House Revival. Johnny Moss stole the show here. Stole it. It’s gone.
Final Rating: ***1/2
House Whitewolf (A-Kid, Adam Chase & Rod Zayas) vs. House Strong Style (Pete Dunne, Trent Seven & Tyler Bate)
Whitewolf are all Spanish and there are fans over here from Madrid to support them. But this is Trent’s House. A-Kid makes the mistake of trying to trade with Trent, in Trent’s House, and this gets him murdered with stiff as fuck chops. The Spanish lads stand out from all the other unknown types by coming at BSS with speed and aggression. Adam Chase looks particularly good. Pete Dunne loves the challenge. He’s so accustomed to wrestling familiar opponents that he could wrestle just about anyone in the UK in his sleep. This gives him a chance to mix it up with fresh opponents and he loves it. All of BSS look particularly energised after the early Whitewolf assaults. BSS have a defined style of trios match and that’s full bore here, all action and spots galore. It’s suitably snug when it needs to be and it’s a hugely exciting match. Easily the best on the show to this point. The action is non-stop and the finish is a mess of BSS excellence before Tyler downs A-Kid with the Tyler Driver. This left Quack breathless. The Whitewolf lads get a standing ovation for their part in it.
Final Rating: ****
Casa Dorada (Juan Francisco de Coronado, Cornelius Crummels & Sonny Defarge) vs. House of Sports (Danny Boy Collins, Mal Sanders & James Mason)
World of Sports represent! Mal Sanders starting wrestling 40 years ago. He’s retired several times but keeps returning. Danny Boy Collins has been around for as long as I can remember in BritWres. Mason didn’t start wrestling until WOS was in the bin but has the same style and has been one of Dixon’s leading lights on the camp circuit for 20 years. There is a LOT of experience on this team. Mason is the youngest, as he’s still in his 30s, the other two are 50s, Sanders possibly in his 60s. Both Sanders and Collins look old but Mason is crisp as ever. The Chikara Pro regulars work as heels and work heat. It allows the crowd to revel in their youth (or their historical references) by chanting “cheater”, “easy” and assorted other japes from a time gone by. Like with the other older statesmen team from the UK it’s tough to get into the opponents because the Brits are so entertaining. Coronado is the champ for Chikara though so it’s easy to see why they’re positioned as the important team. The heels cheat to win. I really wasn’t into this. The heels didn’t provide a good foil for all the old school action across the ring and the match was overlong and under dramatic. The old boys gets a standing ovation, which they deserve for their dedication to the biz.
Final Rating: **1/4
Team Fight Club Pro (Omari, Kyle Fletcher & Millie McKenzie) vs. Team Furies (Fire Ant, Solo Darling & Travis Huckabee)
Team FCP’s warm up match the previous month was fantastic. They have an interesting set-up here with FCP’s three plucky youngsters going against an established team from Chikara. They are also two teams with two men and one woman. As per usual the FCP kids look good. The potential in their young talent, and how FCP utilises it, is a major highlight of BritWres right now. They interact well with the Chikara regulars. The pace is suitably frantic, after a sluggish previous match, and the youth of FCP gives the match a lively vibe. One of the best aspects of the match is how Solo and Millie get to star, showcasing women’s wrestling as not being limited to women vs. women action. They never make a big deal of the intergender stuff, which is a trademark of Chikara. The false finishes are pretty cool and Omari looks especially good where timing is concerned. Solo picks Millie off with the Sharpstinger but both teams looked excellent here. All of the FCP guys have huge futures in pro-wrestling.
Final Rating: ***3/4
House Sendai Girls (Meiko Satomura, Cassandra Miyagi & DASH Chisako) vs. House Xyberhawx (Nytehawk, Razerhawk & Sylverhawk)
Xyberhawx look like Power Rangers. Their style is a mix of comedy and flips. Meiko is the biggest star on the show, arguably, and Sendai Girls won the KOT last year. That makes them strong favourites against the relative rookies of Xyberhawx despite the difference in size and gender. Cassandra has come along a lot in the last 12 months. Her timing and selling is way better than in 2016. Often the taller girls in Japan take longer to develop due to the size differences. It might even help her to be wrestling larger opponents here. Once the action breaks down from heat on DASH to sheer madness and an avalanche of spots it gets super-good. The ladies pick up the win and it’s another standing ovation.
Final Rating: ***1/2
House Throwback (Simon Grimm, Dasher Hatfield & Mr Touchdown) vs. House Attack (Chief Deputy Dunne, Jim & Lee Obstruction)
The Anti-Fun Police in the main event and they’ve brought Los Federales Santos Jr with them. Mr Touchdown (Mark Angelosetti) has a tremendous old-timey Gridiron gimmick. Gotch was an unknown factor coming into his new Indie run but he’s busted his ass and has genuinely got people excited to see him. He looks terrific again here, hurling Damian and the Hunters around. House Throwback are definitely my favourite Chikara team, even though Grimm is an outsider. Damian brings his gimmickry to the match, the loudspeaker being a major highlight, and he’s arguably the stand-out. Fair play, young sir! It’s a fun main event and the Hunters deserve the exposure, even if they’re hidden behind moustaches here. Dasher Hatfield is one of those Chikara guys who I wish got the chance to wrestle elsewhere. Chikara have a weird thing about not letting their talent move around and get exposure. The match earns that main event slot with an assortment of hard work, entertaining spots and relentless action. Everyone gets stacked up in the corner and somehow Dasher hits an Exploder on Damian off the top of it for the win. This was awesome. Great work all round.
Final Rating: ****
A cracking first night. I honestly thought I’d get burned out to the trios being every single match but the variety was enough for me to enjoy it and some of the matches were fucking great for the first night of a tournament. I got to see some new talents and some new mixtures of existing talent from all over the world. I’m not entirely keen on some of the results but I enjoyed it. Looking forward to night two!